Star Wars funny

What I've been reading (part of)

I picked up a book the the library called Secrets and Wives: The Hidden World of Mormon Polygamy, by Sanjiv Bhattacharya. I'm always interested in a book about polygamy, told from either side of the moral fence, but this one, told from the perspective of a complete outsider (a British journalist of East-Indian descent based in the US) promised to be interesting and hopefully fairly non-biased. The following excerpts were from within the first 60 pages of the book.

It's April 1, the Sunday of the LDS Church's biennial National Conference weekend, and anywhere between a billion and a trillion Mormons are pouring out of the conference center. The men and boys look chipper and corporate, their dark suits so stiff the hangers might still be in the jackets. The women resemble an army of Martha Stewarts or small-town news anchors, supreme in their assurance that their salvation is secure, their linens spotless and their souffles certain to rise in this life and in the next. No one rushes or dawdles or crisscrosses the rows, and this goes for the children, too. The orderliness is immaculate. Their pacing and posture is so even, so metronomic that I'm thinking of microchips and slow-release medication, to Nurse Ratched, George Orwell and Invasion of the Body Snatchers starring Donald Sutherland. Outside of Japan or the insect world, I've never seen anything less unruly. It's so very ruly it's terrifying.

Really? Terrifying? I've been to conference. I've seen the crowds when they get out. I've never seen anything metronomic about them. Kids run and skip. People jostle each other as they try to get to their cars just a little bit faster than the family next to them. The only difference between this crowd and the crowd leaving say, a symphony performance or an Amway convention (hee hee) is that the General Conference crowd is nicer. But slow-release medication? Either this guy went to the one conference where only robots attended, or he was looking for a certain behavior before he set out. Later in the same chapter, he discusses the streets of Salt Lake City:

Spend a few days in Salt Lake City, however, and the prospect of Mormon power is a shuddering thought. And not just because of the dismal liquor laws. In the Downtown District surrounding the temple, the streets are vast, vacant, and alienating; the intersections are barren expanses; pedestrians look lost and cowed. It's Brigham Young's fault for stipulating that the streets should be wide enough to turn a horse and carriage. He surely envisioned his Mormon Mecca as a hive of bustling saints, busy consecrating their profits to his beloved church. Instead he created a scene from 28 Days Later, peopled only by missionary drones stalking the streets searching for new souls. Even cars look adrift, stranded at red lights for eternities, watching tiny pedestrians traverse immense crossings.

All right, he does have some funny comments to make, I agree. Mormon women confident that their souffles will rise in this life and in the next? Funny. Dismal liquor laws? I don't even drink and I agree the liquor laws in this state are very quirky, and not in an endearing way. But alienating streets? Pedestrians lost and cowed? There are many avenues just as wide in New York City. I doubt he would use the same descriptions for the streets in the Big Apple. Maybe we just keep things too clean here. Or need more winos begging on the corners. Then maybe he'd feel more comfortable. My point, though, is this: If the man can't even describe Mormon crowds or the streets of Salt Lake City without resorting to negative and foreboding imagery, how can I believe that his take on any of his experiences is without a serious slant? I can't. My hopes of a non-biased perspective are misplaced. I'm so disturbed by the smarmy, condescending tone, I'm wondering if it's even worth my time to finish the book. What should you do when you begin to question the value of a book partway through?

Star Wars

Hee hee. Star Wars silliness.

Shoe giveaway - yes, shoes!!

My favorite shoe review blog is giving away a free pair of Jambu shoes from the fall/winter line. Jambu are some of my favorite styles. They are funky and comfortable - very me. So, even at the risk of decreasing my chances to win, I'm willing (happy, actually) to share the link with you. Go. Comment. Win.

Birthday cake

Katie's 8th birthday was today. She asked for a Phineas and Ferb cake, and as Perry is the only character that I think is at all attractive, this was the cake I went with. Although it was a very simple design, I'm pleased with how it turned out. I think I captured his expression well. Hey, where's Perry?
The cake was a standard yellow boxed mix, baked into two 9-inch layers. I frosted them with store frosting (shh, don't tell anyone) colored Perry color (sky blue with a touch of green). I traced the bill and filled it with yellow frosting, piping it in with a round tip, but then spreading it to make it smooth. I then outlined it in orange. The eyes were difficult. First I tried making some eyes out of frosting on a sheet of waxed paper and freezing it, hoping to transfer them to the cake when frozen. Well, store-bought frosting doesn't get hard in the freezer. Crap! About 1/2 hour before the dinner (where we would serve the cake) I was trying to decide what to do, when I saw the almond bark and the bakers chocolate in the cupboard. I knew they would turn hard in the freezer. So, a quick melt of white chocolate, a speedy art moment of shaping the eyes, and about 2 minutes in the freezer and I had the whites. I placed the two best on the cake and piped the melted dark chocolate around for the brows and irises. Then into the fridge with it all to get it all to set, and...voila! I was very pleased (as well as relieved.) And the girl was thrilled. I love the big smile when they see the cake for the first time. Fabulous!!

Katie's baptism invitation

I made this invitation over the last couple of days. I am very pleased with it.
It feels good to have done one good thing in the morass of laziness and self-indulgence that has been my life of late. (Working on that.)

An excellent FHE

We had LDS General Conference this weekend, which means 8 hours of church for the kiddos, though thankfully not all in a row. It's not easy to keep the kids paying attention for that long, but our kids are getting older, so we insist that they take notes. This actually works quite well. I reward them (with daddy dollars - good for wii time) for staying on task and not needing reprimands, but I also wanted to reward them for the quality of their notes. In the past I have given a candy bar, or a portion thereof, depending on the thoroughness of their notes (taking into account their ages and abilities.) This year, I wanted to avoid the candy thing, the direct connection between good behavior and sugar. Yesterday, I had an idea. I went through my own notes and also did some online searching and found quotes from many of the talks. I tried to find a quote that really represented the gist of each talk, or a very recognizable tagline. I also included some very simple questions for the little ones. Then we had an open-note quiz-show type contest for FHE, trying to guess who said each quote. It was so fun! The kids were searching their notes for the right talk, looking for either the direct quote or even a talk with the same subject matter. We had some basic ground rules to make things flow easier. The simple questions were for the little girls only, and they were allowed to answer in age order (i.e. Sarah got first crack, followed by Katie, then Liz.) The quotes were open to everyone. First hand up was called on first. If you answered once and got it wrong, you had to wait until everyone had made a guess before you were allowed to try again. When you got an answer correct, you got to choose a prize from the "prize bucket" that I keep in the house, filled with little items like erasers, pencils, balloons, stickers, and whatever little things I pick up during the year on clearance, etc. It was a blast! Definitely a keeper. The kids should have an easier time taking notes next time, now they know how to listen and what kinds of things to write down. I think this will become a fun family Conference tradition. Below are the quotes and questions I used this year.

• Let us be as quick to kneel as we are to text. -Ian S. Ardern
• The lord uses a scale very different from the world’s to weigh the worth of a soul. -Pres. Uchtdorf
• Was told by Pres. Monson, “It’s better to look up.” -Carl B. Cook
• I promise you that if you will respond to invitations to share your beliefs and feelings about the restored gospel of Jesus Christ a spirit of love and a spirit of courage, will be our constant companion for 'perfect love casteth out fear.' -L. Tom Perry
• Scriptures are like packets of light that illuminate our minds. -Richard G. Scott
• The devil could not have written it. It must be from God. -Tad R. Callister
• The most important thing a father can do for his daughter is to love her mother. -Elaine S. Dalton
• Be loyal to the royal within you. -Elaine S. Dalton
• It is extremely important that we have a spirit of gratitude in our hearts. -Quentin L. Cook
• Hello! -Thomas S. Monson
• First we have promised to become charitable. Second, we promised to become witnesses of God. And third we promised to endure. The Book of Mormon is the best guide to learn how well we are doing and how to do better. - Henry B. Eyring
• The name the Savior has given to His Church tells us exactly who we are and what we believe. We believe that Jesus Christ is the Savior and the Redeemer of all mankind. He atoned for all who would repent of their sins, and He broke the bands of death and provided resurrection from the dead. We follow Jesus Christ. - M. Russell Ballard
• Although the world has changed, the laws of God remain constant. They have not changed; they will not change. The ten commandments are just that -- commandments. They are not suggestions. They are every bit as requisite today as they were when God gave them to the children of Israel. - Thomas S. Monson
• Youth today are being raised in enemy territory with a declining standard of morality. But as a servant of the Lord, I promise that you will be protected and shielded from the attacks of the adversary if you will heed the promptings that come from the Holy Spirit. -Boyd K. Packer
• It may be true that man is nothing in comparison to the greatness of the universe. At times we may even feel insignificant, invisible, alone, or forgotten. But always remember -- you matter to Him! - Dieter F. Uchtdorf
• We believe in families, and we believe in children. -Niel L. Andersen
• We learned that in order to go to our son’s rescue, we did not need a planning meeting. We simply acted.- Jose L. Alonso
• Sister Biereictal, because of her love and her charitable nature, even in her own great need she willingly shared her food with a starving prisoner of war. Later, when asked how she was able to keep her testimony during all those trials, she replied, “I didn’t keep a testimony through those times. The testimony kept me.” -Barbara Thompson
  
  QUESTIONS FOR LITTLE KIDDOS
  
• Where does Conference take place?
• How often do we have Conference?
• Who did you sustain as prophet, seer, and revelator?
• How many members in The Quorum of the 12 Apostles?
• Name one group who sang during Conference.
• Who presides at Conference?
• Name one person who conducted Conference.
  

A post for Pinterest

Where can I find this? I really like it!

Can I just say?

It irritates me when people assume the phrase, "God bless America," carries with it an implicit, "...and to hell with all the other countries in the world." It doesn't. It only says what it says. Please God, please bless America. We need it. If I pray to do well on a test, does that mean I want everyone else to fail? No. When I pray for my children to pass safely on their way to school, does that mean I wish ill to all other children? Of course not. Perhaps the case could be made that if one were to pray to win a competition, then one is wishing the other team to lose, to fail. But international affairs need not be a competition. One country does not need to fail for another to succeed. Not in a ideal world. So the phrase, "God bless America" means just that. And nothing more.

And as long as I'm at it, when the Dugger family (18 Kids and Counting) thanked God for the blessings that were their children, there were a very vocal few who managed to find that offensive. If children are a blessing from God, then that must mean the Duggers thought that lack of children implied lack of blessings, i.e. God doesn't love those without children as much as He loves those with children, and you can tell how much God loves you by the numbers He blesses you with. How self-absorbed must you be to think that someone's gratitude to God is an insult to you? Amazing.

Whew! All right. I'm done.

Ethics vs. Economy

I have certain beliefs that I try to incorporate into daily life. Some of them have to do with food. I think animal fats are good for you, so long as they are healthily derived. I think that processed fats and synthetic fats (like hydrogenated oils and soy/cottonseed oil) are very bad for your health. I think processed foods as a whole are bad for you. The whiter the grain, the worse for your health, with the possible exception of rice every now and again. If it comes packaged in plastic and you can eat it right out of the bag, it's probably not good for you. I think sweeteners should be used sparingly, and even then they should be as minimally processed as possible. I also am of the opinion that the human body is designed to deal with poisons and poor foods in the diet, and so the occasional intake of any of the above foods will not cause trouble in the midst of a healthy diet. So, you can see where I'm coming from, food wise, right?
Now, here is my dilemma: Do I have a responsibility to feed a large group of people at the same standard I feed myself and my family, or can I justifiably feed them at a socially accepted standard? Making the food choices I do is not as cheap as the alternative. If I'm bringing a dish to a potluck or bringing a meal in for compassionate service, or even bringing cookies to a Primary party, can I make the food with cheap sugars, processed grains, and questionably healthy oils in order to save money? Especially if I feel that the recipients have no concern whatsoever which way I choose to do things? What is my moral obligation as far as food is concerned?

All right. I give in.

I decided to blog this giveaway at the Tall Snob Blog. This is the first time I have ever done this, linked a blog entry to a contest. Is it worth it for one more entry? We'll see. I certainly hope so, even if it feels just a little mercenary. Like having ads on your blog. I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing. Just not what I'm used to. On the positive side, I love to support any organization that's advocating for cute clothes for tall people. I wouldn't call it an earth-shattering cause, but it does mean something to me. So...if you are tall and want to win $50 (and who doesn't), click on over and enter. Or something like that.

Nice

I heard once that in order to consider myself well-read, I needed to read something by Larry McMurtry, so when I found Lonesome Dove at the DI, I snatched it up. I'm still getting into it, but came across this passage that I loved.

The boy's face lit up as if he had just been given a new saddle. He had practically worshipped Jake Spoon once, and would clearly be willing to again, given the encouragement. Augustus felt a momentary pang - he liked Jake, but felt him to be too leaky a vessel to hold so much hope. But then, all vessels leaked to some degree.

Nice. Very nice.

Pretty

Putting this on my blog so that I can pin it on Pinterest. I found it online a while back, and I can't find it again, hence the self-publish. I claim no copyright to this print. But isn't it pretty? I would love to find fabric of this to do my girl's rooms.

How good is your laundry detergent?

There's not much nicer than the lovely heat from a wood-burning stove on a cold winter day, right? To this end, Russ has decided to take the oldest 2 kids this week and go wood cutting on Smith's Mesa. The wood that's available to cut are some trees that were burned in a fire a few years back. As the fire moved through quickly, the trees were really only burned on the outside, and they still make great firewood. Plus, they're free (which is one of our favorite words in the whole world.) The only real problem is how filthy handling this wood makes a worker. Check out these photos of Aubrey and Russ after a morning hauling wood. It makes me cringe just to look at them. I'm sure glad I don't have to do the laundry by hand.

No more music

The service I was using to put the music player on my blog changed their policy, and they now have ads about every 3 songs. I'm not sure when this happened, because I haven't blogged in about a month, but if you ever were here and had to listen to commercials int eh music, I'm so sorry. I HATE commercials and ads that appear when you don't choose to watch them, like at the beginning of videos on Youtube and Failblog, or in the middle of the news article you are reading. I know that companies have to make money, but they didn't have ads for the first 2 years I used them. Why now? If the ads had been there from the beginning I wouldn't mind so much. Or if they let you know they are changing their policy. But when they just start throwing ads around without warning, I feel offended. I try my hardest to keep that stuff out of my life. I don't let the kids watch too much commercial television (we usually watch dvds - and skip the previews), I don't subscribe to magazines. I even try to put name brand stuff in generic containers in my house, trying to avoid the brand-name recognition and influence at least a little bit. (See this article about the effects of advertising on children.) So when I was working on my blog and enjoying the music and heard the commercial for McDonald's, I got mad. I removed the player and emailed the company telling me how disappointed I was. I'll be looking for a player that doesn't have embedded ads. Or maybe I won't. That music I chose mostly for me to listen to while I was working on posts. I have tunes on the computer. Perhaps I'll just let a little peace and quiet reign here on Simple and Small.

What I've been reading

Yeah, I've spent a lot of time reading this summer. I just love it. I keep thinking I need to get to work on other projects, but I have a list I just can't seem to take a break from. It helps a lot that all of my kids are old enough now to keep themselves occupied. Usually by reading as well. Cool! I went through many years in reading Siberia (due to little children needing constant attention) and now I'm really enjoying being back. So, here's the list:

• I Am Not a Serial Killer, Mr. Monster, and I Don't Want to Kill You, by Dan Wells. I saw this series on the Whitney Awards. Mr. Monster won the 2010 Whitney Award for best novel. I started the series expecting a psychological thriller, but then it morphed into a fantasy thriller. I was confused (probably my own fault) but I finished the book, and the series, and quite enjoyed them. The books are about a young man who has antisocial personality disorder, a condition associated with psychopathy and serial killers. He is obsessed with killing, and causing pain. However, his logical mind knows this is wrong, and although he has no empathy for others' emotions, he doesn't want to do what is wrong. He is at war with himself. Then, into his small-town world comes an actual serial killer. I enjoyed the books, and could see the author grow as each book progressed. I think the second book, Mr. Monster, was the best of the three, but I look forward to the next installment. (On a side note, I loved Mr. Wells' dedication in the first novel. It read, "For Rob, who gave me the best incentive a little brother can give. He got published first." Classic.)
• Escape from Rwanda, by John Bizimana. This is a story of this man's escape from the slaughter in Rwanda, when he was a child. John was very lucky, in that his mother was alive and was able to accompany him and his siblings, that she was able to bring some valuables with them, that they had friends to go to in neighboring countries, and that they had family in Europe and the US to get the children out of Africa after their mother passed away. It's hard to believe how harrowing the story is, even with all that "luck." The story of humanity in general is so filled with contradictions - people risk their lives to save other people who are fleeing still other people intent on killing them. How can people be so wonderful and yet so horrible? It frightens me that we all have the potential for either within us, depending on the circumstances. In addition to his physical circumstances, the book discusses John's emotional reaction to the upheavals in his life until he found the LDS church, which gave him a solid foundation of moral belief and social support that helps him along with his life. All in all, an uplifting book about overcoming the challenges of our lives and finding God.
• The Captive, by Victoria Holt. I've been trying to find books for Aubrey to read,a s she devours books as quickly as I do. I remembered I used to love Victoria Holt as a teen, so I found one at the D.I. for Aubrey. Who doesn't love a good Gothic romance? I know I do. Victoria Holt, under several pen names, produced nearly 200 novels, and so if Aubrey enjoys them, she'll have plenty of reading material for a good while. (Reading material that doesn't have anything to do with vampires.) Well, of course, I had to read it first, for old times sake, and I enjoyed it. A quick, light read just for fun. Nice.
• As I was in a nostalgic mood from the Victoria Holt, when I saw a copy of Tarzan of the Apes, by Edgar Rice Burroughs, at the library, I felt I had to re-acquaint myself with it as well. I remember reading several of the Tarzan novels by Burroughs as a young teen and finding them quite thrilling. This newer edition (2008) has an introduction by Gore Vidal and an afterword by Michael Meyer. My heart thrilled to the fond memories of action and adventure, while at the same time my mind cringed at the blatant coincidence, anthropomorphism, and sticky Victorian stereotypes. I loved the bulging-muscle, bodice-heaving fun of the jungle, but I had forgotten the truly terrible finish to the novel. No wonder the movies kept changing the ending. All in all, a fun trip into the past. But I don't think I'll re-read any of the sequels.
• The Healing Spell, by Kimberley Griffiths Little. This book, another find from the Whitney Awards, is a juvenile fiction book about a young girl, Livie, growing up in the bayou. Her mother is injured and in a coma, but is brought home by Livie's father to recover surrounded by family. What a sweet book about the struggle to go from childish fear and guilt to more mature responsibility and acceptance. At it's core it's a book about love, with it's many challenges and frustrations, as well as it's comforts and rewards. I enjoyed this novel, and highly recommend it.
• Wolves, Boys, and Other Things That Might Kill Me, by Kristen Chandler. A novel aimed at teens, this story follows KJ Carson, a young woman growing up just outside of Yellowstone National Park, who is caught up not only in her social and romantic struggles, but also in the small-town debate regarding the reintroduction of wolves into the Yellowstone environs. As the controversy heats up, so does the conflict in KJ's life. I think this novel does justice to the depth of emotion and struggle that comes with changing the status quo, whether it be environmental (wolves), social (new boyfriend), or emotional (seeking independence). I think this book will really appeal to my daughter, who is struggling with all these issues. Except the wolves.
  

So there is a month's worth of books. I did start The Girl Who Played with Fire last month, but put it on hold when some of the above books came available at the library. I will pick it up again someday, and report. People who's blogs I read keep recommending good books, and my list continues to grow. Although a looming list creates a bit of pressure, and there is much satisfaction in finishing a to do list, when I find myself wondering if I will ever finish, I kind of hope not.

What I've been reading.

So, it's been ages since I blogged about what I've been reading,and I've read many, many books since then. I will list a few of them and give you short reviews. No in-depth plot synopses here. I just want you all to be impressed with how many books I'm reading these days.

• The Dark Mirror, Blade of Fortriu, and The Well of Shades by Juliet Marillier. These books are a historical fantasy series about King Bridei, a king of the Picts in Scotland around 500AD. Very intriguing. I've really enjoyed everything I've read by this author.
• Matched by Ally Condie. I was steered toward this book by the Whitney Awards, and I was very glad that I was. This is a book for teens in the vein of The Hunger Games. A future dystopian society creates, through it's manipulative tendencies, the very tool that may bring about it's downfall. I really liked this book. A lot.
• The Land of Painted Caves by Jean M. Auel. The final (I think) in the Earth's Children Series. I felt had to read this just because I had read all the other books in the series. The first book in the series, Clan of the Cave Bear, was truly exceptional. I loved it and have read it several times. The next two, The Valley of Horses, and The Mammoth Hunters, were also very good, if a little on the explicit side. Following were The Plains of Passage and The Shelters of Stone. At that point, I think the writing began to slide, although the research seemed exceptional. This last book seemed forced and stilted, just a contrived vehicle for the author's meticulous research into the ancient artwork decorated caves of France. I can't really recommend it very highly.
• Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater. It's rare that I find a book so un-engaging that I don't even care to finish it. This was one of those rare times. It's the first in a series about werewolves in Wisconsin (or maybe it was Minnesota. Whatever.) I didn't like it. I didn't even finish it.
• Dragon Keeper by Carole Wilkinson. This book is from the juvenile section of the library. I've really found some books I enjoy in this section (Harry Potter is in the juvenile section), and I'm always on the lookout for more. This book, first in a series about a slave girl who saves the last Imperial dragon and finds her inner power along the way, was a good read, and I think my kids will really enjoy it.
• Book of a Thousand Days by Shannon Hale. I really enjoy reading Shannon Hale. She has a very fresh perspective and a unique voice. Fabulous.
• The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks. I had heard so much about Nicholas Sparks I wanted to read something by him. This was a sweet book, but very sentimental and depressing. I did finish it, and passed it on to my mother, but I doubt I'll try this author again.
• The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson. This series got a lot of attention as well, and I wanted to find out if it was because of the quality of the work or the premature death of the author who had burst so unexpectedly and successfully on the literary scene. Turns out it was the work. Although the subject matter is somewhat disturbing and grisly, the book is a lovely tapestry of stories and characters that comes together in a fabulous finale of justice. I liked it. I'm starting the second in the series, The Girl Who Played with Fire now.

So those are the books that have made an impression on me in the last couple of months. Hope you find a couple on this list that you want to read (or avoid, as the case may be.)

Some days...

I spent a couple of hours the other day making these. Because some days this is how I feel. Especially in the summertime. (I was inspired by some similar drawings that were available on t-shirts, but it looks like the company went out of business about 3 years ago. I hope there is no copyright infringement, because I thought they were funny, and I went ahead and made my own.)

Quote of the whatever.

"...computer users could be divided into digital immigrants (those of us who were trying to catch up) and digital natives (younger people seemingly born hardwired for the new technologies, or maybe it's just that they've studied computers in school). With the exception of a few very young, edgy-looking women, most of us in the room counted as immigrants - me and the silver-haired librarians. In spite of our best efforts, we were never going to master this language that those born after about 1980 speak so fluently. We could learn the lingo and tools of the digital age, but we would always have a thick accent when we spoke." (This Book is Overdue!: How Librarians and Cybrarians Can Save Us All, by Marilyn Johnson.)

So true. So true.

What I've been reading

Just finished a series I would recommend. I found myself very engaged, and read the entire trilogy in a week. (Granted, it was during the week after I had surgery, so I had a lot of time for reading.) The Sevenwaters Trilogy, by Juliet Marillier, including Daughter of the Forest (a beautiful retelling of the Celtic swans myth), Son of the Shadows, and Child of the Prophecy. They reminded me of Shannon Hale's Bayern series and Megan Whalen Turner's Thief of Attolia series, only for grown-ups, as there is a little more reference to sex (but not in any gratuitous or offensive way.) If you enjoy that type of fantasy, you will enjoy these books. I found out as I was poking around on the Internet today that Ms. Marillier wrote a couple of stand-alone follow-ups to the series, Heir to Sevenwaters (2008), and Seer of Sevenwaters (2011). These, of course, will be next on my reading list, but I always worry when authors finish a story and then come back to it years later. Often this doesn't seem to work out well. I'll let you know.

Refer to...

Posted a little entry over at Morning, Noon and Night.

Rambling

I watched a documentary last night about James Christensen, the LDS artist. I find his work engaging, but a little strange. Fantastic, in it's true definition, I think. But I also saw how much of an influence the European masters had on his work. Some of it is quite traditionally beautiful, which I like. I enjoyed the program (on BYUtv) because I got to see a lot of his work, as well as getting some commentary from the artist (and others) to explain the themes. Many of his pieces really touch me. My favorite is "The Widow's Mite," but there are many others I didn't realize I liked until I saw the show. (I recommend this program if you have time to watch it.)

The thing that touched me most about the show, though, was something Mr. Christensen said when he was talking about reading The Lord of the Rings in college. He said,

"I wept when I was finished because I could never read it for the first time again."

Wow. That's exactly how great literature should feel. I wonder if I ever felt this way. I do recall feeling sad as I finished books that I liked, because they were over. I think that may have been some of the same emotion, but I failed to recognize it in the same way. Alternatively, though, there is great joy in becoming familiar with a piece of literature, as well. There are books that are like old friends, books that I love to read them again and again, because they move me and comfort me and have a wonderful familiarity. In my mind, a relationship with books is like a romantic relationship. First there is a thrill of discovery and an excitement of something new. A lust, if you will, that fades as familiarity increases. But with that familiarity comes a comfort, a closeness that you can never have when the relationship is new. With my husband, sometimes I miss that thrill, that emotional flush of first falling in love, the tingling excitement of exploring untried intimacy. But I would never trade it for the solicitude, the mature passion, the depth of emotion that comes with a relationship that has had time to truly flower. There is a poem by Carol Lynn Pearson that speaks to this dichotomy.

Spring Is Only for Beginnings

Our love
Was a blossom,
Full and faultless
On the tree.
But when the petals
Began to fall,
All
You could see
Were the sad
Leaves scattered
On the ground.

You did not
Think to watch
For autumn
When the fruit
Is found.

There is value and pleasure on both sides, new and old. But you can't have them both at the same time. You have to give up the one to get to the other. Everything in it's time, I guess. A lesson for life.

So. Art, literature, relationships, and poetry all in one blog - I've run the gamut. Definitely a ramble. Thanks for sharing it with me.

Blog 2x per week?

Sometimes I just don't feel like saying anything.

The OCD spectrum: More fun than the color wheel.

I'm a list maker. Love to make lists. They help me function. They help me think. So the other night in bed, I started making a list of my OCD quirks. I believe that OCD works on a spectrum, like autism. In autism you can go from the mildest Asperger's Syndrome on down to non-functioning, full-blown autism. Well, in my humble, non-medical, never really researched opinion, OCD is the same. There are those with a few little quirks, like me (over on the lovely red, perhaps slightly orange, side of the spectrum), and there are those who cannot function in society because of their compulsions (way down in the nasty purple end of things.) Somewhere in the middle but a little more towards the blues are those people who could be on the A&E show, Obsessed. I saw that show several times. It freaked me out a little. There but for the grace of God, you know? Here is a little list of my OCD issues:

• I only like to sleep on my own pillow case. Even after laundering. I label mine and Russ' so they don't get mixed up. Hey, keep your body oil and your dead skin cells to yourself, right? I will wash my sheets if anyone else sleeps in them. Even my kids.
  
• Same with bathroom towels. I have my own color, and no one gets to use them but me.
• My toothbrush is not allowed to fraternize with anyone else's. If they touch, it's gross. Russ must keep his tooth cleaning items in his very own cabinet. (Yes, I realize we have committed the act of making children together, with all it's attendant bodily fluid swapping. Different brain compartment altogether.)
• Animal fat is gross. But I can touch it if I'm cooking so long as I wash my hands about 10 times while dealing with it.
• I will not milk the cow. Unless my husband is dying. And now that Aubrey knows how, not even then. Cow udders freak me out a little. OK, a lot.
• The volume on the TV is best when it's set at a number divisible by 5.
• My closets are fairly well-organized. Shoes must snuggle up only to their mates. Clothes are hung in a logical order (sweatshirts, long-sleeved exercise shirts, short-sleeved exercise shirts, short-sleeved casual shirts, long-sleeved casual shirts, dressy shirts [long- and short-sleeved together], skirts, dresses, and not-currently-worn-things at the end.) But, they are not color coordinated within their categories. See? I'm totally in control.
• Finally, I make lists. Lists are how I control the world. If I put it on a list, I can deal with it. When I don't use lists, I find I get stressed very easily. You see, if I forget an item that's written on a list, I can blame myself - faulty memory, whatever. But if it's not on a list and I forget it, the world is out of control and I have no power. So I make lists. Make sense?
  

Turns out my list is not nearly so long as I imagined it to be. Nor are the items particularly peculiar. Which is a comfort, because I worry about my kids. JR has issues with people touching his food, and he will not eat dairy unless it's pasteurized. And even then, he won't touch butter. Or plain milk. But he will touch dirt, and his room often looks like a tornado went through. So he's probably a lot like his mom. A little quirky, but far to the left of any problem amount of OCD. What a relief.

Goals and failure.

So each year I make myself and the kids a bookmark with yearly goals on it. Things we want to end the year doing better, or not doing at all, whatever. My bookmark has a few general goals for the whole year, and then a new goal for each month that I only have to accomplish for that month. I figure that gives me time to establish a habit if I want, but if it doesn't work out for whatever reason, I can leave it behind and not feel guilty about failing for the rest of the year. Make sense? So my goal for the month of April as to blog twice a week. Hmmmm. I'm obviously having a hard time with that one. There is a lot going on in my life, but I don't feel like typing it up. I'm not sure if I'm just lazy, or if life is frustrating me so much I just don't feel like sharing. Both, I think. I do have another blog these days, Morning, Noon and Night, which is just a repository for recipes. But if I count the entries on that blog (which I am definitely going to do), then I've kept my goal. However, I do want to keep up on this blog as well, so I'll do a quick recap of life these days.

Aubrey has decided she wants to try home school, so we pulled her out of school and have had her at home for a week now. She's a teenage girl, which means every action must be accompanied by much drama, either in the form of childlike (childish?) enthusiasm for things she likes, or conversely, sighs and pouting (tears even, occasionally) for things she considers horrendously burdensome. She does seem to be getting the work done faster than she would at school, but I do wonder how thoroughly she is learning the subject matter. It remains to be seen how well home schooling serves her. I know it's giving me plenty of opportunity to practice those patience muscles.

Due to some female-type issues (regarding which I will be happy to give you details if you ask me in person), it looks like I will be planning a major surgery within the next month or so. Yes, that major, female-related surgery. The issues and subsequent surgery plans have put a little dent in my fitness efforts. I've gained back quite a bit of the weight that I lost over the last few years. This causes me much stress, as well as the psychological baggage that comes with giving up such a huge part of my identity. I really will be glad to put things behind me and get back into the swing of things again. I want to do some serious running and biking. Soon...soon.

Not to mention (stupid phrase, because hey, I'm going to mention it), my birthday is this month. Yep. 42 years old. Most days this doesn't bother me at all. But there are some days it scares me. Not because I'm getting old, per se, but because it means everything is going to change. My baby will go to kindergarten next year, and I'll have to look at being a different person than "mom of little kids." I like who I am. I don't know if I want to be that older lady, "mom with kids all at school." And that's another step on the path to "mom of grown-ups," which is a place that really scares me. I am happy. I love my life. Maybe I won't love my future life as much as I love my present life. How sad would that be? Always remembering the good old days when I was truly happy? Scares me.

So, I think these are the reasons I yell at my kids too much these days. And why I don't blog. So there.

In which the center of the universe wakes up.

So I'm sitting at the computer this morning, getting ready for the day. Check the i-cal for appointments, check facebook for events, make a list on a post-it pad here. In my poking around online I find an album from which the proceeds go to support relief efforts in Japan. $9.99 for 38 songs. What a deal! I like the artists and it's only 10 bucks so I buy it and begin to listen to the songs. Nice. Good deal for me. (Pat self on the back.) Back to my to-do list. Only now I'm thinking about my counterpart in Japan, the mom, trying to decide what to do today. It strikes me how different our lists are. Mine includes things like this:
-Gym
-Copy of birth certificate to school
-Drop off dry cleaning
-Library
-Pray that little tickle in my throat doesn't get worse

Hers might include things like this:
-Find food
-Find uncontaminated drinking water
-Don't lose place at shelter
-See if missing relatives have been found yet
-Pray that they are not dead

It makes me weep. Literally weep. (I'm glad I keep tissues in the office.) Although I'm glad I found the great deal album with 38 songs for only $9.99, I am embarrassed that I haven't done more. Ashamed. If my biggest worries include the $25 fee for an immunization waiver for Sarah and what to serve with the smoked salmon this weekend, then I am truly blessed and have a great obligation to be more helpful. And I'm a great believer in the idea that guilt and shame are useful emotions, so I am going to make this week be about helping where I can. Not just Japan, but wherever I can. Pinch the pennies a bit more and donate financially, as well as work on putting together some hygiene kits for the church. I bet they have sent out quite a few in the 3 years since I last donated. Time to step up to the plate. It's definitely my turn. After all, I just got 38 songs for $9.99.

Rainbows galore

"The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears" - John Vance Cheney
Oh, we got your rainbows right here. Plenty of rainbows. Oodles. We must have at least 5 rainbows a day around here. Sometimes we catch them on film. Enjoy.

Another runner?

My little Elizabeth, who at 9 years old really isn't so little anymore, ran her first marathon today. Well, let me clarify - she finished her first marathon today. Her school, Hurricane Elementary, has a fun program where the kids run a mile once a month during lunch to earn a treat. In conjunction with this fitness program, this year they organized a program wherein the kids ran more laps during recess and worked their way up to 25 miles. Then, on the day of the Sand Hollow Marathon, they came and ran the last 1.2 miles of the marathon, crossing a finish line at about the same time as some of the real marathon runners. Cool, right? Katie wasn't interested, but Lizzie worked hard to get all her miles and we went down this morning and ran the last mile together. In spite of the constant cold drizzle, I think it was a great thing, very encouraging to the kids. I hope this experience has instilled an interest in competitive and recreational running in my little girl, and in the other kids as well. The whole experience was very fun, and I give kudos to those who put so much effort into making sure it came together, especially our friend Liz Dansie. Great work, everyone!! We are definitely looking forward to next year.

Singing time

My calling in my ward is the Primary Chorister, which essentially means I engage the children in learning about the gospel through song. Some singing time plans come together easily, while some never quite seem to gel. Today we start a month of talking about prophets, so I made a matching game for the kids with photos of prophets from youth or childhood. I am hopeful that this will spark the kids' interest and keep them engaged. I'll have them take turns matching the photos, and if they get one right we'll sing a corresponding song about prophets. I just wanted to share the photos I found of 6 prophets. Some of them are quite fun. See if you can guess them. The answers are at the bottom of the post.

1.

2.
3.

4.
5.
6.
1. Thomas S. Monson
2. Gordon B. Hinckley
3. Ezra Taft Benson
4. Howard W. Hunter
5. Spencer W. Kimball
6. David O. McKay

Butter...better.

I just got finished making butter and thought I'd share a little trick we use at our house. And no, I did not take my own photos because I never take photos until the event/procedure is over, due to a recurring memory disorder I apparently suffer from. And let's face it: final results of butter look like, well, butter. Nothing unique to see there. Back to the subject at hand. You all probably know that we have a cow, and that we milk said cow, thereby giving ourselves lots of milk and cream to use and a killer morning schedule. There is only so much one can do with fresh cream, so we use quite a large percentage of ours to make butter. Making butter is pretty basic - whip it up in the blender or stand mixer until the butterfat separates from the buttermilk, then press the rest of the buttermilk out by hand. You are left with beautiful, yellow butter, which is delicious. But, it tends to spoil quickly left at room temperature (because I can never get all of the buttermilk out and that little bit of buttermilk left in it goes sour), and it is impossible to spread if you keep it in the fridge. So we have devised a clever solution. After I have churned and pressed the butter, I whip it up with the hand mixer, adding salt to taste and a bit of olive oil. I would guess I use about 1/4 - 1/3 cup of olive oil per pound of butter. When that is all whipped together, then I can store it in the fridge and still spread it on bread, etc., without committing Wonderacide (the act of slaughtering a piece of bread by attempting to spread it with cold butter.) This has worked quite nicely for us. The little taste of olive oil is not unpleasant at all, if you notice it (which I don't), and it still is one of the healthiest spreads you can find, as opposed to those nasty "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter"-type spreads. (Megan Mullally, you should be ashamed of yourself.) This trick would work just as well with store-bought butter, in case you happen to not have a cow. Just warm the butter to room temp, whip in some olive oil, then repackage in whatever nifty plastic containers you have on hand. Enjoy.