What was I talking about?

Over the last few weeks, I've come to the realization that I'm losing my mind. Truly. As I've dealt with long summer vacation, getting the kids back to school, planning preschool for Sarah, and generally being very busy and scheduled, it has become apparent that I do not have the mental capacity that I used to, and it's scary. Now, I'm not losing my mind in the going mad, talking to myself and answering back sort of way. The TV does not transmit secret messages from the CIA, and there is no one out to get me. I think the one reality I have to deal with is plenty. And I'm not even referring to the swiss-cheese memory that shows up after the hormonal onslaught that is child-bearing (although I really do hate that.) No, the losing my mind that I'm referring to, the one I'm in the midst of is more of a "can't be relied on to remember a damn thing" kind of losing my mind.
I have always accepted that there is a certain amount of information that the human brain "loses" in a given day. I accept that. Very few of us humans can remember all the little details of the incredibly busy life that goes on around of. We cannot know as events occur which little pieces of information will be important later, so we use our experience to cull out what we judge to be the most important, and we discard the rest. Sometime our brains are wrong, and we forget something important. It happens to everybody. I really do accept that, and am the first to say don't be too hard on yourself. But this level of forgetting is a level at which I have never found myself before. It's very frustrating to me. I've always been one who could rely on her mental abilities to achieve pretty much anything I wanted. In my college days I could manage an hours-long, complicated stage production with relatively little trouble. But now, I can't remember something from one minute to the next.
Last Friday, for example, Elizabeth's Activity Day leader called to remind me that Liz had an activity that afternoon. 3 hours later, I sat in the family room and played board games with the girls and did not remember the activity until after dinner. Liz cried. I felt terrible.
The Primary leaders are writing the Primary program for sacrament meeting and wanted some responses from the children. We parents were gives a question to ask each child and requested to return the responses by the 15th. Did I remember? No. But even worse, when the counselor called to remind me last Sunday, I told her I'd get it to her that afternoon. Great day to do it, Sunday. I forgot until Tuesday.
And phone messages. Don't even get me started. If you tell me something to pass along to Russ or one of the children, you'd better hand me a paper and pencil at the same time, because I won't remember for at least a week, if then. There are post-it notepads all over the house for me to write notes to myself and others. After the note is written, I then have to find a prominent place to stick it. Bathroom mirror usually works the best.
I have used my iCalendar in the past, but really just in a casual way. I like to make lists to help me organize my thoughts. I've never really relied on either the calendar or the lists to get things done. I think writing the event down used to be enough to cement it in my mind. I like to feel organized, to be organized on paper, but then be free to follow or not follow my plans. I guess this is all about to change. I guess I will need to actually enter things into my calendar and then actually LOOK AT IT. Every day.
So I will apologize in advance to anybody that I will make an appointment with. Visiting teachers and teachees, doctors and dentists, playgroup moms and exercise partners. Please forgive me. I apologize to my fellow preschool-in-the-round moms, because I WILL forget to drop Sarah off, and worse yet, to pick her up - at least once. Again, please forgive me. It's nothing personal. I'm just too distracted ... looking for my mind.