In which parenting becomes even harder.

Aubrey has been chafing under parental admonitions regarding schoolwork. When it was time to do homework, she wanted to read. When it was time to do housework, she pulled the homework card. She kept telling us she could take care of things herself. So we decided it was time to let her show us how well she could do. We're letting her have an opportunity to be totally in charge of her own homework, etc. It's a good time, since 7th grade isn't part of what's looked at for college entrance. She gets to decide her homework schedule, although I still remind her now and again. Old habits are hard to break. The only caveat is that at the end of the quarter, her grades have to be acceptable, or there will be consequences. Serious consequences. Sounds good, right? We get a little break from having to be in charge of her every minute, and she get the opportunity to test her little wings regarding self-discipline and developing a work ethic. An opportunity for great learning for all involved. Except...

She now has 2 F's. Yep.....2 F's. I'm about to pull my hair out. I am a little uptight about grades, which is interesting since I did not have such great grades in high school. I even failed an English class in 9th grade and had to go to summer school before my senior year to make up the credit. And I don't think my scholastic sloth impacted my life too negatively. It's hard to tell, of course, but I'm pretty happy with the path my life has taken, so I don't really rue the opportunities those high school grades may have cost me. At this point I doubt they will ever come back to haunt me, either. "Now Sister LeBaron, we were considering your husband for a general authority position in the church, but then we got a peek at your high school grades. Sorry, but you two will instead be offered a service mission teaching sewage sanitation practices to the people of outer Mongolia." Not likely. But I find that my kids' grades are far more emotionally significant than mine ever were or could be. How's that for payback? I truly feel for my dear mother now. I guess I gave her a rough time without even knowing it. And now I'm in the same boat. The curse remains in effect. (You know the one, where your mom promises your kids will be just like you?

Anyway, Russ and I are keeping our mouths shut for now. She certainly has the opportunity to pull those grades up to A's fairly easily. And I suppose even if she doesn't, a valuable lesson can be learned about responsibility and the work ethic, yada yada yada. I suppose the lesson may be learned even better if she does fail and ends up with some serious consequence. Which is all well and good, except...my baby will have failed a class. Waaaaaahhhhh! I want her to be perfect. It's hard to let go of those emotions and expectations and just let her be herself. Perhaps it is I who will do the most learning from Aubrey's educational mishaps. Perhaps the most valuable lesson will be the one where the mom learns to let go, so the child can really excel on her own terms, and succeed in her own way. If that's true, well, I sure hope I get an A.