Unjustified

Saturday evening my brother-in-law called and invited the girls to come over and go swimming. Russ and I were in the office and concurred that neither of us wanted to go, but someone should take the girls anyway. This someone is usually me, which is fine. I'm the mom. I get to stay at home, and that earns me a much freer schedule in some ways, but a more demanding one in others. One of the ways in which it is more demanding is that I'm always on call, 24/7. Russ had just spent the day planting corn, fixing sprinklers, weeding the back lot, and getting the little house rented. He leaves early in the morning, works as long as he can, and comes home tired. I stay at home and work all day, too, but my duties ebb and flow and are more re-arrangeable than his, so it usually falls to me to continue supervising the kids until bedtime. And I think I'm pretty happy with the system as it exists at our house. This particular evening, I was blogging, so when Russ got of the phone and we decided the kids should go swimming, he turned and finished his finances, and I finished my blog entry. When I shut off my computer, he was dressed in his swim stuff and was hollering at the kids to get ready. I was surprised. "I thought you didn't want to go." I said. "I don't," he replied, "But I think they need to go, so I'm going." Can I just tell you how mad I was? I was furious. Livid. How dare he? I mumbled something sarcastic about being sorry I finished my blog before I got ready, and then I just shut the bedroom door and let him go. I took a good hour to calm down, and I really began to wonder why I should be so insulted. If he had complained about my timing I would have told him that if he wanted things done according to his schedule, he was welcome to do them himself. Which is exactly what he did. And I was actually happy to not have to go. So why was I so mad? Was I irrational, or were his actions really insulting? I still can't decide. I guess I don't mind if he takes some of these duties on himself, but only if it's because he loves me or wants to give me a break, and not because he thinks I'm failing in some way. Anyway, I recovered my composure long before they got home, and we haven't spoken of it again, but I wonder. Which was it? And do I really want to know?